What is swing?

From experimenting with different sex positions to bringing accessories into the bedroom, there are a plethora of ways to take your sex life to the next level. But more and more couples are starting to flirt with the idea of ​​non-monogamy as a way to find fulfillment. In fact, in a 2020 YouGov survey of more than 1,300 US adults, about a third (32%) said the ideal relationship is not monogamous to some degree.

“Some form of non-monogamous relationship dynamics might be for you if the idea of ​​being intimate with more than one partner excites you,” says Amy Baldwin, sex educator, sex and relationship coach and co-host of the Shameless Sex Podcast. "Some people choose this to spice up their current partnership with newness and vivacity, while others may do it to remedy sexual or emotional needs that are not being met in their current relationship."

It is worth noting that ethical non-monogamy can take a variety of forms, one of which is swing, also known as “lifestyle”, a sexual practice that involves sexual activities with another couple and single people. Here, how this specific type of consensual non-monogamy works and best practices to get started.

The basics of swing

Baldwin explains that a swinger is typically:

• Married and/or heterosexual.
• In a committed relationship.
• Open to engaging in sexual activity with other people.
• With the aim of having a shared experience with the partner.

That said, swingers can also be loners, says intimacy expert Susan Bratton. And they often gather at public or private parties (which used to be called "important parties") that are hosted at rental homes, resorts, or even cruise ships.

"Most parties allow couples and single women - affectionately known as 'unicorns' - but severely limit the number of single men who can attend because otherwise the ratio would drop too low for a horny bunch of men," she notes.

You can usually find swing parties with a simple Google search, but the most important aspect of engagement is being invited, showing up, and being invited back over time to establish yourself as a reliable and valuable addition to the group, explains Bratton.

What swing involves in practice

During couple switching, partners can engage in sex in the same room so that partners can see each other during fun. This can also provide a sense of security for some. But sharing the experience doesn't necessarily mean sharing the same space. Swingers can also participate in sex in separate rooms.

While the partners may go their separate ways the underlying intention is usually a feeling of shared excitement or vitality that somehow fuels more fire in the partnership.

There are also several levels of partner switching that swingers engage in:

A gentle exchange: Involves sexual activities and may include oral sex.

A complete exchange: Involves most sexual activities, including having sex (vaginal or anal, depending on preference).

Some couples like to start off with gentle exchanges to start noticing everything, so to speak, while others prefer to simply reserve intercourse for the romantic relationship. The level at which a couple is willing to exchange may be related to health preferences or concerns, such as STI transmission and risk of pregnancy.

The difference between swinging vs an open relationship vs polyamory

While it may seem counterintuitive, couples who swing don't necessarily define the relationship as open. Think of 'open relationship' as a generic term. This term can encompass everything from purely sexual, no-strings-attached experiences with multiple people to dating and/or deeper connections. Also, open relationships are more about meeting each person's unique needs, while swing is about 'teamwork'.

A third form of consensual non-monogamy is polyamory, which is different from open, swinging relationships in that it focuses on building relationships with others outside of the main partnership. It's less casual and more about love or connection, often resulting in multiple love relationships and even multiple committed partners. You can read more HERE.

How to know if swing is right for you

If you're not sure which type of non-monogamy appeals to you the most, consider whether you want a shared experience with your partner, maybe you want to try swing.

But if you want to exercise your own sexual freedom or autonomy outside of your current relationship, you may be more interested in an open relationship. And if you want to connect and even love multiple people, polyamory might be your best bet.

How to get started on swing

Consider taking the following steps to get started swinging:

Talk to your partner.

Once you've concluded that swinging is the form of non-monogamy that would work best for you, start the conversation with your partner. If your partner is okay with it, make sure you spend plenty of time learning more about navigating non-monogamy, as well as having lots of clear conversations about feelings, boundaries, and needs.

Getting a positive response from your partner is crucial to getting started swinging. Both partners must have a similar level of interest before attempting the swing. If one partner is unsure or is just doing it to make the other happy, it is more likely to cause emotional pain and possible separation. If you are the partner who receives the proposal and you feel pressured, it is a bad sign.

The more communication, the better.

Get ready to communicate more than when you were monogamous. Things become a little more complex when we allow more people into our intimate and energetic space.

For example, you will want to discuss the rules. Talk about the level (soft or full) that you agree with. It is essential to feel comfortable discussing boundaries and preferences with your partner.

And be sure to review safe sex practices related to STDs and pregnancy risk. Regular STD testing is recommended for anyone who has sex with multiple partners.

Take small steps.

You can start with smaller and more relaxed experiences, maybe a gentle exchange that involves just foreplay or make out, to start with and after each session, confirm with your partner if everything is ok, if they are still in agreement and what they can/want to try next. . Through each experience, you will get a better sense of what is most satisfying and exciting for you and your partners.

Produtos relacionados

Set Obsessive White-Daise

Mini Dress by Lapdance Headed Pink or Black